Self portrait as a Saguaro



Sometimes I feel like you
A flowering hosh, has:an, saguaro
Breathing in the rocky sand

A bright, boiling star eyes my waxy, sprinkled skin
I look at you and I can feel the prickled
Toothpicks stand on my skin
Just like when I see the hosh of my eye

I feel like you before the monsoons
Restless in the heat
Ready for the rain
& the new year

Seeing relatives pick off
My blooming fruit
For years longer than something called a nation state
Whatever that is

Sometimes I see you leading
Me to other hosh older
Than the state of Arizona
Standing taller than the
Politicians looking like over watered prickly pear
With pricks spilling out of their mouths
Poking and bleeding out
Letters with no song

Sometimes I feel like you
seeing freeways being built
over my relatives and friends
Feeling the rivers dry in my spine

My belly unfull
In the heat
The magnificent heat
Under my weight
I am protected beyond the laws
By something stronger
Something laws cannot govern

When I see you
My belly is full
& the rain clouds appear
Bustling, dripping, rested


♥Japanese Breakfast- Essentially♥


Published by asdzaabeat

Amber McCrary is a Diné zinester, feminist and writer. She was born in Tuba City, Arizona (Diné Bikeyah) and raised in the Reservation bordertown of Flagstaff, Arizona. In the small town of Flagstaff is where she discovered her love for Punk Rock and the Do it Yourself Culture. She received her Bachelor of Arts in Political Science with a minor in American Indian Studies from Arizona State University. She is currently an MFA candidate in the Creative Writing Program at Mils College. She enjoys many things in life such as tea, traveling, writing, reading, sulking, gardening, eating, smashing the patriarchy and learning about cultures and her own (Navajo/Diné). She currently lives in Oakland, California. Her work has appeared in Yellow Medicine Review, Bluestockings Magazine, Cloudthroat magazine, 580 split, Warship Zine and the Introduction to Women's, Gender, and Sexuality Studies: Interdisciplinary and Intersectional Approaches 1st Edition.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: